I dont know why I even BOTHER to blog at all since no one ever comments on them....*ahem*....so I shall vent, even though noone is listening.
Bastardly men....yes, they have their prickish moments. I will be 35 this year *shudder* so it is about time that I stop being manipulated by the silent treatment and fear of disapproval.
My other half decided to get his dick in a knot the other day because, and I quote, "You were home all day and couldnt have at least picked up around here?"
NOTE: I had worked the night before. My sleep was in 30 minute bursts. The house was clean enough to suit me.
So the greeting I received when he walked in the house from HIS job was a bitching and moaning session. Instead of freaking out and fighting back, I asked for a specific example of what he wanted "picked up."
He points at the sink and says, "Theres DISHES in the sink!!!!!"
He was right. There WERE dishes in the sink. Two of them. A fork, and an 8 inch skillet that he had used the night before.
I looked at him and said, "Oh my GOD" and walked away.
Dont get me wrong, I had the urge to scurry around the house and regain his favor....but after 6 years of the same old argument, I decided enough is enough. Some people you just cant be pleased.....and besides, if he wants spotless, he can go back to his ex wife....she has the IQ of a rodent, but by God, she sure keeps a clean house. (Yes, I wanted to say it out loud, but I didnt.)
Then my thoughts got carried away with me. As I was sitting indignantly on the couch, listening to the asshole thump around in the kitchen, I started to have insane thoughts:
1: Perhaps he will cut himself while slicing his precious SALAD vegetables. Wouldnt that be a SHAME.
2: Perhaps he will choke on his precious SALAD. Does a swift kick in the stomach count as the Heimlich maneuver?
3: Im starving, but there is no way on earth that I will touch his fucking SALAD that he made. (Ill wait till hes gone to bed and then eat some)
4: Hmmm....hes in the shower is he? Time to flush all the toilets in the house.
5: Are those his keys laying there? Wouldnt it be a shame if he couldnt find them tomorrow morning. How on earth did they get stuffed between the couch cushions??
6: What? Theres holes in all of your socks? How did that happen? Curious.
7: You want sex? Gee, are we craving affection? Welcome to my world. Come back later when your ready to be nice to me.
So he ate his fucking salad and went to bed without saying goodnight. I was crushed.
The next morning, he came my room (YES, we sleep in separate rooms. I dont have the energy to explain way) and gave me a perfunctory kiss and left without saying goodbye. I would have rather Blossom lick my cheek with her noxious dog breath.
Uggggggghhhhh. Im STILL pissed about this!!!!
To make a long story short, we are now on speaking terms and acting like everything is ok.
I also bought about 60$ worth of cleaning supplies yesterday, but I will use them when I am goddamn good and ready to!!
7 comments:
You should take his pitstick and rub it on the dogs ass. Better yet, fart on his face cloth :)
Oh my my my. Dani's frenz and relashinz are a faskinatin' bunch... I'm just commenting, so you know I stopped in. Fantastic rea, though I did throw up a little in my mouth when I read the part about the ganglion stalk.
I much prefer the Green Apple Pucker. If you drink it straight from the bottle, after the first half the cicadas sing louder and after the second half everything starts moving in slow motion. Bennies 0, Pucker, 2.
Launi and I got in a rip roaring fight last saturday night! It was our , "once every 3 year fight".
He was being an ass and pissed me off. So I stormed out of the house, went and ordered enough fast food to feed 12 line backers, and took it back to mom and dads to eat it.
Apparently, the sight of a huge, pregnant, volitile woman was more than mom could take, so she went and took a bath.
Dad looked at me tenatively and said..."So...is everything okay?"
I snarled back "ITS FINE! I don't WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!" (As bits of hamburger bun fell out of my mouth..)
He said .."Alrightly then.." and read his book in his recliner, whilst I ate with Julius!!! He was the only one who had the nerve to be near me...bless his heart.
I knew that karma has shifted in MY direction when later that night..Hubby put both the dogs outside, but didn't tie up CHLOE.
The result? Launi had to get out of bed, put his clothes on, and traspe around the neighbourhood looking for her. *snicker..snicker*
He came back to the house, with Bastard dog tucked under his arm, and he had snow in his hair. I felt vindicated!!
Don't worry...Deaner will get his.
I could have written that post except for the part about him making his own salad. Stephen has "cooked" maybe 4 times in the 10 years I've been with him. I don't include Bar-B-Q since I have to prepare everything, he just throws it on the grill.
I think all men go through this stage. Stephen will be 40 this year and he already acts like an old grump. For the time being I have some excuse so he doesn't bitch too much but I KNOW it's coming.
Just let him bitch, ignore his child-like behaviour, silently wish he'd just fall off the face of the earth, and feel satisfied that you are a better woman than his ex and a better woman for not killing him where he stands.
I understand!
Oh my, he should come to my house....you can eat of my floors....no really- you can eat off my floors, lets see, there is a raisin, some mac and cheese-oh and for dessert some pudding-chocolate-smeared on the table! Bon apetite.
You go GIRL!! From what I can remember your silent treatment was always killer!
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